No Words

 

The poems I want to write

Are the hardest to get on paper

The words stay hidden

Behind the emotions binding them

Or maybe it’s the fear of never

Being able to truly capture

Our moments

Because words can never 

Do them justice

Rachael Collins

My Name

 

In the darkest of my days

I sought a release

To take me from

The pain I’d buried inside

That had surfaced

Spreading from limb to limb

Until I could no longer hide

From the torment 

That robbed me of everything

And kept me locked up

In a prison of my own making

In the darkest of the haze

I lost myself

Until you offered me a glimmer of hope

A glance my way

A smile upon your face

That lit the darkened corner

Of my hiding spot

A moment of recognition

Of seeing me

Laid bare

Vulnerable

And you didn’t run

Didn’t shy away

Later it was the 

Furtive touch 

Of your fingers

On my arm

The shadowy touch

That pulled me from self harm

You left me craving

Longing for more

The sound of your voice

Unlocked my doors

Until I stepped out

Into the world beyond

And fell

Into your arms

I never thought

My name important

Until I heard it

Escape from your lips

Rachael Collins

Loving

 

Loving the world means loving the wobbles

Because the real beauty is in the imperfections.

The notes sung slightly off key

With all the confidence of a five-year-old.

The slightly blurry photo of a moment of laughter

The slight limp in a person’s swagger

The hiccup of doubt that creeps to the surface,

The curviness of a body that has been well-loved

The crooked grin of affection

The beauty of the world is not in the silver lining of a cloud

But the whole massive storm that rains down and washes the earth.

It’s the freckled face of a person looking to hide her beauty

The cactus that has found life in the crook of a tree

The wrinkles on a face  that map a person’s story

The track of a tear down a cheek,

The last worldly embrace from my father.

It’s the beauty big and small 

Overwhelming and consistent

It’s trying to find that one redeeming quality

That gives hope to the hopeless.

It’s in learning to love every piece of me

With reckless abandon.

Rachael Collins

Love, Hate, and the Dash Between

 

One day I realized that I’d felt it all

All the emotions big and small

I thought I didn’t have anymore in me

To give to you what you might need

I’d been loved and I’d been burned

I’d been hated and I’d been spurned

I’d known great friends 

I’d had relationships reach their end

I’d given everything I had

I’d lived my days sad

I’d given my soul

I’d been broken and made whole

I’ve pushed and encouraged

Dreamed and been discouraged.

I’ve been surprised

And satisfied

I’ve raged and been furious

I’ve been downright mad and curious

I’ve been full of despair

I’ve lived like I had no cares

I’ve wanted and needed

I’ve been defeated

I’ve lived a good life it would seem

Because I’ve had love, hate, and the dash between

Rachael Collins